Long ago in the land of newbie bloggers, I was TechnoBabe. I was married and working and busy and added blogging to my busy life, starting TechnoBabe's Adventures to test the blogging waters.
Then the home life began the downward spiral. I thought my heart would break. I thought I would be crushed from the weight of the pain and the stress.
Contrary to what I thought would happen, I survived and am doing well. Every once in awhile someone finds this blog and asks me if I was TechnoBabe. During the five plus years I blogged as TechnoBabe, I met hundreds of fine folks in blogland. These days I am blogging less, commenting less, and keeping a lower profile. But I made it through some difficult times.
Deciding to leave the TechnoBabe persona behind, I began this blog about a year ago. And what this blog does for me is give me the strength to blog as myself. Something I thought I would never do. I ventured to the old blog today and read some of the posts. I liked the look of that blog that I spent so much time perfecting and pouring love into as well as receiving so much love from readers. It was a great trip down memory lane.
I am no longer married. I no longer work. I live far from my children and grandchildren. I live alone in an apartment. Well, not quite alone because Lola, my cat, is a great companion. However, as bleak as that sounds, I am happy, healthy, living a full life. I have cultivated some amazing friends in real life and have some friends from my youth who I love immensely. I am fortunate to have dear people who love me as I am and encourage me in my endeavors.
So yes, I was TechnoBabe, and now I am just me. CiCi. And happy to be me.
Thank you to the sweet bloggers who read and comment on this blog, thank you for sharing this past year with me. Your blogging friendship is appreciated and cherished.
20 comments:
In reading the old blog, did you see and really appreciate how far you've come and why I always point that out! You've had an amazing journey to find the real Cici and to allow us to get to know her!
You've been through so much. It is hard to leave a blog behind, but sometimes it's necessary to move on. I've been inspired by your strength and perseverance through such a difficult time in your life. You've shown your readers how it's possible to come away from such pain and heartache and find happiness.
I was reminiscing my "old" blog too. I was different, I had a different voice, I have evolved. We move on, life is continuous change and moving. I'm glad you are my friend CiCi.
I enjoyed reading your Techno Babe persona. As we all grow and change, some of us cope well and you're a classy lady on your journey. I'm glad you like where you are now.
Although we have never met in person, we are real friends in the real world of Blogville. I knew you then and I know you now. You have shared the essence of yourself in both blogs, and I am very honored to have met you and cherish our friendship. Yes, you have evolved and have entered this phase of life fully. You are an inspiration and a survivor! Virtual hugs, CiCi!
i am glad you are happy being you...i knew you then but know you all the more now....hard to believe i have known you almost 4 years now as i think i found you about 6 months after i started...hard to believe i have been doing this 4 years....whew...smiles...it is the people though i have met on the journey that make it worth it for me...smiles.
You have done a wonderful job of moving forward. I am so glad you have found the peace you now have in your life.
Ms A, Yes, it was clear to me that I was not allowing myself to reveal "just me" in the previous blog. And I do like the person I have become. Thank you for your consistent encouragement.
Terri, we all have a choice to learn and grow from our life experiences. For me, it was a difficult and at times heart wrenching labor. Moving on has meant being healthy, and I am enjoying the rewards of taking care of myself. Thanks for your kind words.
Lisa, you are indeed a different and better person now. It has been great witnessing your transformation. I am glad to be your friend.
R.J., while writing posts as TechnoBabe, I remained just slightly aloof I think, protecting my anonymity. Pshaw. Being myself is freedom. Starting over in many aspects of life has taught me to be strong in who I am and continue to grow in who I want to be. Thank you sincerely, R.J., for your continued support.
DJan, speaking with you on the phone last year was a pure delight. Regarding inspiration, you inspire me to stay active and remind me of the importance to continue to move and exercise. I treasure my friendship with you and always appreciate your thoughtful comments.
Brian, you have a great buddy to me over the years. Your talent is inspiring and your warm heart toward humankind is hopefully contagious to all who meet you. Time flies, doesn't it, so glad to know you. Blessings to you and your family.
Jeanie, thank you for reminding me that moving forward is so much better than moving on. Can you believe how long we have been fans of each others blogs and lives, different though they may be.
I never knew you as TechnoBabe but it's interesting to know you once had an alternate identity. I feel like I just unmasked a superhero. I'm happy that you now find your life so rewarding, and I'm proud to know you and be part of your support group. God knows we all need one.
CiCi I found your blog first as Technobabe and honestly that name gave me a completely different image of the blogger behind the blog. It's great to know you have sort out what life has dropped in your lap or thrown in your face.
I feel you and I are friends in the truest sense even though we have (and may never) actually met in person.
Congratulations on your new life and embracing all it has to bring to you.
xoxo
I never met Technobabe, but I'm sure I would've liked her. I think starting a new blog amid all of the changes was a wonderful idea. And I'm certainly glad to know CiCi - better CiCi than never!
I have so loved watching you blossom in the last year. The fact you rely on the blog less and less shows how healthy you are, and it makes me very happy for you. xoxo
I have been a follower of both. And I wish I was able to be as brave as you. Now in my senior years I struggle with poor vision and fears of becoming a burden rather than an insertion. You have made brave changes. Glad that you have Lola. pets an be such a blessing. And you have friends, something I have left behind over the years likely because my days are always with Buddy.
I found you (or you found me) as TechnoBabe and enjoyed you then but I really feel I KNOW you now. I treasure our friendship and I am thrilled to see you come into your own like this, this past year. Hugs to you, dear CiCi.
Yep -known you for a long time now in the blogosphere, haven't I? And I'm so glad that you are now "YOU" and content in the life and manner you have today. It was a big move but one you conquered and I'm so glad to have you as part of my life all this time too! Peace!
I remember Technobabe well. :) I even remember your photo with the shades on. I've enjoyed getting to know you through all your changes. I'm glad you are happy and content now. I'd like to think we've all grown and changed over the years. :)
I' glad you're in a good place; you are clearly a survivor, and I'm glad you're still here in Blogland :) Thanks for keeping in touch.
Stephen, pleasant thought, support group. We are that for our blogging friends. Thanks very much.
Bill, I didn't pick the name TechnoBabe, that was a nickname planted upon me at the time. Ha. It is great to just be myself now.
Ina, you betcha, sweetie. Isn't it great to meet people in blogland that are such great friends? Thanks for your love and kindness.
Abby, I didn't consciously consider that I was starting a new blog amid the chaos and pain, but that is exactly what I did. It has been one of the things that has helped me grow and learn. I am so glad to know you too.
Liz, you and I have watched each other make changes and learn much. I am blessed to have so many great blogging friends like you.
Heidrun, you have much responsibility, whereas I have very little now. I hope your life can become more peaceful and give you time and energy to pursue your interests like photography.
Hilary, we did find each other and it has be a joy seeing your life evolve as well. You definitely know me now, and I appreciate your friendship.
Jeni, we have indeed known each other for a very long time. I am still amazed at your survival and your energy. Thank you for your encouragement.
Joey, I have watched you grow too, and enjoyed watching you and your family travel through your adventures. There have been changes, and thankfully they have been positive and healthy.
Mrs 4444, I still have some seeds you sent me from your mom's plant, will plant them in spring in my little flower garden area under my window. There were times I thought about leaving blogging behind but then I would think of something I would want to write about and share on the blog, so I guess I will be around for awhile longer.
I'm really happy for you, CiCi. If I haven't said so yet, Merry Christmas!
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