Three and a half years ago I was still in California, working at a job I knew was not good for me. I was working with a sponsor in a twelve step program in codependency. The lessons I was learning and the growth were hindered by the caustic atmosphere of the job. No need to go into it in detail, but it became clear that one year at that job working around the deceit and negativity was harmful to me. I needed to change jobs.
Better than a job change was a move from California to Nebraska. At the time I did not realize how the stressful situations in California affected me on a daily basis. Traffic day and night. Angry drivers, rushing because they did not leave early enough to get somewhere on time. Taking chances and changing lanes to get one car closer to their destination.
After so many years living in that environment, my system was set for early departures to get to work or appointments a little early. I do not like being late, even to social events. I lived around people who did not attempt to keep appointments or arrive at a designated time even if it meant other people were being kept waiting. I was one of the people kept waiting as if my time were not important. Even family members would arrive for holiday dinners two hours late.
Early in my Nebraska life I discovered I did not have to leave an hour early to get twenty miles away. It has taken some adjusting to relax here. The first time to sign up to eat at the senior center in this little town I wanted to walk south to the bank eight blocks away to the ATM and then east seven blocks to the center. I gave it a half hour when it actually took fifteen minutes. I laughed inside when I realized that after three years in Nebraska, I sometimes still think in California time.